Monday

It is Monday evening and my last night in South Africa. I fly out at 7pm tomorrow and will arrive in Memphis at 2pm on Wednesday. I really feel like I am leaving at the perfect time. I'm glad I have some time tomorrow, but I am also glad I am leaving tomorrow. Yesterday, Sunday, Christy and I went to Robben Island, where Nelson Mandela was imprisoned. It was a hot, windy day, and the tour of the island was interesting and thought-provoking. On the ferry ride back to shore, Christy and I were almost napping, feeling the sun bake our skin and the sea spray our face, when the shouts of passengers awakened us in time to see a WHALE!!!!!!!! It was amazing! I have never seen a whale before, and this sucker was so close! It's huge head was out of the water with its mouth wide open for a long time. It went back under and then splashed its great tail before disappearing from view. Thank you Lord. :) I went to church last night, then came back and prayed with Craig and Liesl. 

We asked God to speak to us, and He did! We sought God on my future plans. He gave Liesl and Craig visions affirming me and speaking of the plans and promises He has for me. It was such a sweet time. God spoke clearly to me and spoke through the Stewarts to me. You can ask me about the specifics if you are interested.. it was such a blessing! This morning, I slept in until 10am (yay!) and spent 4 hours at Kirstenbosch. I had a lovely English breakfast and spent wonderful time praying and journaling. God has really opened my eyes to the spiritual battle that has been waging over me this year. I strongly feel that I have been living in the enemy's lies this last year and I have been slowly and subtly absorbing these lies as truth and dying in spirit as a result. My sin has been a consequence of lies I have believed, and I have neglected the Word and prayer and community that would all speak truth into me. I don't know how to put into words what God has actually done for me. I feel like a princess in a fairy tale. My king really did heroically rescue me from the enemy's grasp. He lifted me out of despair and spoke truth into me. He wooed me and spoke His love to me through other people, through His Word, and through His own sweet voice in my heart and head. He brought me to Capetown to be with Him and He showered me with His sweet attention and time. Today, as I walked along the garden paths, there rose in me a righteous anger about the lies that I believed and acknowledged in joy that God has released me from them. God is focusing on teaching and reminding me who I am in Him now. He brought me to a spot in the garden looking up at the mountain, and He spoke to me of my worth and my identity in Him. I spoke aloud to me, and He answered me. He gave me a heart to praise Him, and I sang to Him at the foot of His mountain. My God has brought me so fully into His presence. 

Tonight, I went to a friend's party and said goodbye to some wonderful people I have met here. Tomorrow morning, I am hoping to talk to Liesl about what the bible says about spiritual authority, then I am going to spend a little time at the Waterfront. I will say my goodbyes and begin my long journey home. I am excited to go home. God is telling me to arm myself and guard my weak areas because there is hard spiritual battle ahead. He is also so clearly telling me that He will continue this work He has begun in me and pursue me just as hard in the states as He has been here. I am changed... I am healing... I am living. Praise God! I knew God brought me here to do something in me.. I just wasn't sure what. He accomplished more in me than I could have imagined, and He has promised to continue. Thanks for reading... I don't know if I will continue this or not. I will see those of you in Tennessee soon. Love, me. :)  

A hot Saturday in Africa

It is Saturday evening, and the Stewarts have all just gone out for the night. I enjoying some tea and listening to the hot wind blowing through the fruit trees outside. Thursday was a busy, wonderful day. Elizabeth Clack, whom I love, took the day off work to show me around the peninsula of South Africa. We started at 9am and went to Fish Hoek, a beach I went to the first week I was here, and ate some wonderful almond crescents along with our tea. We walked along the beachfront shops, and I bought some fun shoes and jewelry. Next we drove to Boulders, a beach with freezing cold water, huge rock formations (hence the name), and .. wait for it.... PENGUINS!!! It was amazing! I took gads of pictures (yes I used that word) :)! The penguins were all around and walked and swam right up to people. The wind was crazy, so we got berated with sand, but it was so much fun! After hanging out with the penguins for a while, we drove to Cape Point, which looks like the southern most point of Africa, but there is actually one point farther south. We ate at a restaurant overlooking the shimmering sea and mountain. I tried ostrich for the first time... very good (Angela, are you proud?) ;)! Elizabeth and I then climbed the stairs to the lighthouse that looks out into the endless ocean where you feel like you've come to the end of the world. Let me tell you, climbing those stairs was no easy task as the wind was seriously gale-force. We held onto the railing, braced ourselves, and I literally got knocked off my feet several times. My ponytail also slapped me in the face like a ton of bricks... what an adventure! :) After surviving the journey without being swept out to sea, we drove all around the mountain looking for baboons, buck, and zebra. Unfortunately, we did not see a thing, but the view was beautiful and the conversation was wonderful. Elizabeth is a fascinating woman who has fostered an intimate relationship with God since she was 13. God has used her in powerful ways throughout her life, and her stories are incredible... a social worker in South Africa.. wow! We drove along the coast to Chapman's peak, an incredibly beautiful drive sandwiched in between the steep mountain face and the sea. We stopped along the way to take in the view and let the powerful wind cool us down. We drove into little towns to see peaceful, white-sand beaches with sail-surfers propelling themselves off waves and into the air. We made our way back up the coast along Hout Bay and finally got home around 6pm. It was a peaceful day full of the Lord's beauty. 

Thursday night, I went to hear Melissa, an American girl visiting from Tacoma, speak on significance. She spoke to a group of women and confronted the lie that creeps into our heads about our significance in big and small things. She reminded us that God wants to give us the desires of our hearts because we are His beloved daughters and masterpieces. She encouraged us to ask our Father for big things and for our deep desires because He wants to satisfy those desires and give us abundant life. I realized I do not ask God to do very much at all. I ask for little things and still act as if I have to figure things out for myself. When I think over my life, I can honestly say that God has been faithful to meet me every time I have prayed to Him and has proven to me that He can satisfy every desire I have brought before Him. What would happen if I dug inside my heart, found my deepest desires, and brought them before God? What would happen if I dared to have big dreams and big desires and ask God to fulfill them? I am not saying that God will give me everything I want, but I do know that He will give me every good thing I want, and my faith with grow as I ask and I watch Him answer. Man.. prayer is huge!

On Friday morning, Liesl, Vivian, and I went to school to watch Eliza win a swimming competition. The girls and I then went downtown to shop. :) I spent some time in Green Market Square, an area downtown where dozens of vendors set up their booth full of African wares. The market is colorful and loud and full of pushy vendors saying, "Lady, lady, come and see... try this on.. I will give you a good price.".. it was a fun experience. We had lunch at Nando's, a nice little fast food restaurant, and left. Liesl dropped me off at Rhodes Memorial, a large green area on the side of the mountain with a monument I remember from my childhood. I ate ice cream as the day was very hot, and I sat against a column and read through Nehemiah. As I was reading, photographers set up their equipment and conducted a photoshoot of some model astride one of the lion sculptures at the monument.. it was funny to watch her pose. While they were on break, I asked a photographer to take a picture for me.. he was friendly, and we talked about the time he spent in Miami and the time his camera was stolen as well. I like the picture he took... you'll see it on facebook. Friday night, I went with a group of women to Menenberg's, a nice restaurant on the waterfront with live jazz music. The music was amazing, and I had lamb chops for the first time... yum (again, Angela.. be proud) ;)! We had a lovely time and walked along the lively waterfront after dinner to enjoy some ice cream. 

This morning, Christy, a girl my age from Capetown, and I went to Camp's Bay Beach. The African sun was beating down on us, so the freezing cold water was wonderful and refreshing. We jumped through the waves and basked in the sun and talked about guys... perfect beach day! ;) I am now at the house, freshly showered and awaiting a call to possibly go out to dinner with some people tonight. Otherwise, I'm going to enjoy a quiet evening in and rest up for Robben Island in the morning. I am doing well, enjoying my time, and looking forward to seeing friends and family soon. That's all for now. :)

Wednesday

Well, my little, annoying cold has now become a full-fledged sore-throat, stuffy nose, fever cold... boo! It's really my fault though... I traded an amazing night for a sick day... completely worth it! Last night, I went up the cable cars to Table Mountain with three other girls. Two days before we went up, the cable cars had broken down and stranded 900 people atop the mountain for the night... that did not happen to us, but I think it would have been fun. :) I don't know how to describe the view from the top of this mountain... you may just have to wait for the pictures. We walked all around it, then settled into a spot to watch the sunset and eat our picnic of bread, cheese, and wine. The sun set over purple mountains and a shimmering sea in all its pinks and purples. It was hard to look away. When I did manage to turn my head for a moment, my eyes fell upon a breath-taking scene. The full moon was rising in all its glory. It was enormous and seemed only just about the level with the mountain. My head turned to take in each rivaling site, and we eventually walked to the other side of the mountain to an overhanging rock to sit in awe. The moon hung over the city lights of Capetown. They call the view of the lights "the jewelry box." The diamond-like sparkle of the city bowl has earned its name. The wind was constant and cold, but the wine and the view swept every thought of it from my mind. We missed the last cable car that went down the mountain at 930, so we ended up riding down with the mountain employees. As we rode down, savoring every moment of the magnificent view, the African employees erupted into song. The whole cable car sang the South African national anthem with all their heart.. it was amazing! The girls and I were energized from the laughter and joy of the mountain, so we headed off to Long Street, the equivalent of South Beach or Beale Street. We went to have hot chocolate, but the music from the bars and restaurants drew us in. We ended up dancing the night away in any venue where the music caught our fancy... it was a blast! I got back to the house around 1am and woke up at 6am to go to the Warehouse with Craig.

The Warehouse was a wonderful experience. Craig directed the staff to Nehemiah 4 for their prayer time, and we separated to spend some time with that Word and with God. The verse dealt with the Israelites rebuilding a wall and their enemies mocking them and threatening attack. The Israelites prayed and armed themselves so as to be ready to defend themselves while carrying on their work. God spoke to me about what He is rebuilding and building new in my life. He reminded me that I have an enemy who desires to steal from, kill, and destroy me, and I must arm myself with prayer and the Word. He showed me that I must fortify my weak points where I may be tempted to sin or believe lies, and He helped me identify lies I have believed this year. My enemy mocks me as God and I rebuild.. I must identify His lying voice in my head so that I may dismiss it and replace it with truth. 

After prayer time, I went to the clothing shelves and made packs of clothes for women. It was difficult and wonderful. The idea was to pick a piece of clothing, then choose some nice clothes, pants, t-shirts, etc. to fit the same woman. I was told to imagine a woman and shop for her. I tried to match styles and sizes to the woman in my head. It was a daunting task, but I, as well as the others who worked with me, prayed through the work. I prayed for direction in what clothes to select and for the woman who would be wearing them. I really enjoyed the experience. Unfortunately, my excursions last night set me up to be miserable today, so I caught an early ride home and took a nap. The Stewarts and I went out for pizza tonight, and I am now ready for bed at 9pm. I'm looking forward to talking with you and seeing some of you soon... that's all for now folks. :)

Tuesday afternoon

I am sitting in the Stewarts' living room watching little Vivian run as fast as she can and launch herself onto the couch... whoops.. as I was typing, she launched herself head first right onto the ground... I got to play nurse for a moment (meaning rocking her and applying ice). :) Yesterday, I was supposed to go to Boulders, a beach where penguins live. I felt sick yesterday morning, so I ended up just spending the day at the house. I was worried I would feel like I was missing out, but, as has happened several times throughout this trip, God reminded me that He brought me here to spend time with Him... and everything else is just bonus. :) I spend some good time with Him in the Stewarts' beautiful garden with Ruby, their extremely affectionate boxer, at my feet. I sought His direction on what to do and where to go in the next few months. I asked Him to speak loudly because I was not hearing Him speak. He spoke, and I asked Him, "Lord, how do I know this is you and not my own thoughts." He said, "You asked, and I answered." God is patient with me. :) I am seeking confirmation now and intend to explore what I heard Him say, so I'll fill you in on the details when I am ready. Last night, I went with two girls to a Mexican restaurant with a fun atmosphere. We talked about everything from the genocide and healing in Rwanda (heart-breaking) to some of my disgusting, funny (at least in my mind) nursing stories. It was fun.

This morning, I spent some time with Judy Everingham, a family friend who knew my parents well when we lived in Capetown. It was very good to talk to her about the time she spend with my mom and dad. We walked in the gardens of Kirstenbosch and went into Kayaletcha (sp?), the township where I was robbed. She showed me around Learn to Earn, a center for local people to learn sewing, carpentry, and computer skills enabling them to find work in Capetown. I bought some beautiful crafts and enjoyed my time. Tonight, I am going up the mountain on the cable cars to see the full moon with some girls. I have a cold, but it's not bad.. just annoying. I hope this finds you well. Love, me. :)

0846719190

 

A few better days :)

Hello people. :) It is Sunday night, and I am sleepy! I wanted to fill you in on what I've been doing the last few days. Friday morning, I went to see a trauma counselor that the Warehouse people (and my mom) insisted we all see. It was good. She told me to stop telling myself what happened wasn't a big deal.. that was helpful. :) I just took it easy the rest of the day, then went to a dinner party with the Stewart family at a friend's house. It was fun.. good conversation and interesting people. Saturday was wonderful. I joined another visiting American girl and her hostess, Charlene, on a wine tour. We drove to two vineyards for wine and cheese tasting. It was lovely! :) We then had 20 minutes to change and pack, and we were whisked away to Table Mountain to go hiking. A group of about ten young adults went with us. We hiked up Skeleton's Gorge and let me tell you, the climb has earned its name. It was steep and scary and beautiful! Part of the climb consisted of steep, rocky stairs (picture the third Lord of the Rings when they're climbing up the mountain to where the spider lives), part involved climbing up the rocks of a steep waterfall, and part was just a mountain path. We were planning to go down on a cable car, but the famous mist covered the mountain, and the cable cars stopped running. (Let me just say, after the three hour, strenuous hike up, my heart sunk upon realizing we had yet to walk down... but it was great.) We found a rock and ate our dinner of bread and cheese while trying not to get blown over by the fierce wind. The climb down Nursery Path was actually scarier for me than the climb up. I managed to stay near the front going up, but was definately dead last going down. It freaked me out! I was extremely proud of all of us once we reached the bottom and looked up. We then took our sweaty selves out for tea and dessert, went home, and fell into bed. 

Today, I went to Clifton Beach with Anya, the American girl who is visiting here as well. It was beautiful. The weather was hot, and the water was FREEZING! We actually enjoyed being in the wavy water once we couldn't feel our bodies anymore. :) Tonight, I went to Christ Church again, and the sermon pointed me toward prayer again... about praying to know how to pray for someone... praying to know how to serve someone... praying to recognize your spiritual gifts and using them to the fullest for God's glory. I also thought about praying for a Paul... someone to disciple me in a life on life kind of way. That's all for now... I'm going to bed.

Love you family and friends!

A true African adventure...

Ok family and friends... settle in for a real African adventure. It is Thursday evening, and I am sitting safe and sound in the Stewarts' house. The children are sleeping on pallets in the living room, and I am watching them as Craig and Liesl have gone out to dinner. I will warn you, this will be long.. but exciting (at least towards the end). I spent my Wednesday shopping in a mall called cavendish and spending some time reading in cafes. I know what you're thinking. What are you doig roaming through a mall when you are in the most beautiful place on earth?!! I understand... but it was quite a rainy day, and the Stewarts were busy getting the kids off for their first day of school, so it seemed the best place for me to go and spend some time alone. I enjoyed the day. Wednesday night, Elizabeth Clack, the social worker who I met in Tennessee, picked me up for dinner. We had a lovely meal at a pizza place, then went driving downtown to see the Christmas lights in the streets. Elizabeth is amazing! As we were walking to the restaurant, we approached a homeless woman sitting by the road. Elizabeth was well-acquainted with this woman and gave her some money while asking her how she was doing. Elizabeth has made it her life's work to tend the forgotten and helpless people of her world. We ended up back at her flat where I poured out my heart about my struggles this year and the way in which God used her to speak to me and love me back to Him. We talked and prayed, and I felt God very near as we spoke to Him. 

(I have been thinking a lot about prayer and community. Prayer is such a huge part of the community here. Someone told that people confess their sins to one another and pray together asking God to point out their sin, so that then they, as a community, can pray for healing and repentance and forgiveness. She spoke of the deep intimacy this sharing develops among the believers. This openness leaves no room for shame or pride as people know each other's sins and are able to share their struggles and come alongside one another in prayer and repentance.) 

Ok.. back from the sidetrack...I slept over at Elizabeth's house and awoke early this morning to go to the Warehouse with her. The Warehouse is the Christian relief organization Craig and Elizabeth started that works to enable local churches meet the needs of the community. Many people were at the Warehouse, and we split into groups to pray. Two young British people, and Australian young woman, and a few other people were in my group with Elizabeth. We all prayed for different needs among us, and God led someone to read from Romans 8 speaking that we are more than conquerers in Christ. They also read from Isaiah saying that there is no need to fear and that the Lord upholds us with His righteous right hand. We packed up some supplies and drove off to the townships.

Our first stop was Fikalela (horrendous spelling), a home for children 0-8 years old who have HIV/Aids or come from at-risk circumstances. I spoke to the sole nurse responsible for the 35+ kids with enormous medical needs. She administers antiretrovirals, which have an extremely demanding and specific schedule, to the infected children, and tends to the others' needs as well. She spoke of the many children they lost in 2002 when they first started the home and lacked the necessary drugs and resources. She wept. She carries such a burden and responsibility for those lost little children. I have felt burdened for her all day and plan to spend some time praying for Jean. What a heavy weight to carry in one's heart and what important work she does. When we saw the children, they flocked to us and wouldn't let us go. We spent some time playing with the children, and it was joyful and heart-breaking. I could see the tell-tale sores on some of their little bodies and the flies swarmed round their snotty noses as they laughed and basked in our attention. It was very hard to leave.

We next drove to Bakamulela (I again mutilated the name), a home for children of all ages where Elton John had visited the previous Monday. Alongside the home sat a respite care home for adult Aids patients who had been released from the hospital, but were too weak to return hoe or had no one to care for them. I asked a lot of questions and stood in awe of the nurse who administered their medications and assessed each patient daily. We were then going to pray around a preschool where people had been harassing the teachers, but we stopped to say hello to some children Elizabeth knew as she saw them outside their house on the street...

There were five of us in the car with the front two windows rolled down. Elizabeth was talking to an 8-year old boy out of the right side of the car. As she was talking, I noticed a young man in his 20\s notice us, and I felt uneasy, but dismissed it as a newcomers paranoia. We were, after all, in an extremely poor area with shacks all around, but Elizabeth had worked in the area of 18 years without incident. A minute later, a man approached Elizabeth's window laughing. I thought Elizabeth knew him. He took the keys out of the ignition, and reached back to grab the camera from the girl sitting to my right. I instinctively brushed away his hand, not realizing what was going on. Elizabeth said "don't fight." I looked around and realized three men had surrounded us... the one on the right and two on the left. IOne man grabbed Elizabeth's bag from the car, and she sternly scolded him saying, "You will give me back my bag!" the man took the purse from her bag and threw the back back inside with the look of a boy who had been caught by his school teacher. Meanwhile, the third man had reached through the front window and unlocked the back door. The girl to my left locked it back, but the man unlocked it again and opened the door. I had my camera bag around my neck and he reached for it. I was extremely fast and confusing and I think my hands just went to the bag. He leaned in and held a very, very large knife or machete close to my arm and said, "I will stick you." I think I said, "Elizabeth" as I struggled to get the bag off my neck quickly. She said, "You will not stick anyone" and "give it to him." I game him the bag. As everything was happening, Elizabeth was saying, "we are Christians, I am a social worker" in a very righteously indignant tone... she was authoritative and amazing! The young men then just walked casually away knowing that no one would come after them. Elizabeth shouted, "I would have give you money," and "God will punish you." One man shouted back, "we are hungry." Elizabeth said the man at her door had opened his jacket and pointed to his gun when he first approached her. This all happened directly in front of a high school at 2pm in broad daylight as the children we had been talking to looked on. Not one of us has a scratch on us... but this is daily life in the townships. We could leave, but over a million people have to stay and live there.

We went to the police station and spent hours waiting while Elizabeth filled out a report. The family who lived in the house where we had stopped was associated with the Warehouse, and Elizabeth knew them quite well. They came to be with us at the police station. After a few hours, we all prayed together and decided to drop the charges. There was concern that the children, who witnessed everything, would be questioned and asked to identify suspects, and even possibly be harassed by the criminals. They stole my camera bag containing my new Nikon camera and lens as well as my canon digital camera. Though I asked about safety before taking them with me, I feel foolish for bringing them into this poor community. I am not, however, grieving their loss as I knew that was a possibility in bringing them here. Their loss is also nothing compared to the fact that no one was harmed. I am very shaken up, and honestly think I just need to cry. I have been around people all day and am sure I'll break down when I call my mom to tell her. I really felt that the man was quite ready to stab me, and I believed for a moment that that knife was going to go through my arm or my chest. The Warehouse people were quick to come be with us, and we all felt the peace God gave us through their prayers before they even told us they have been praying for us. I felt God tell me that there was never even a chance that any harm would have come to me or those with me.. He was sovereign at every moment. He also told me those cameras were His property anyway. I am still processing what I'm feeling, but God is ever-present and ever-pursuing me. We remembered the verses God had given us this morning in Isaiah and Romans, and Elizabeth said that the reminder of being more than conquerers had prepared her to react in the bold manner she did. The Stewarts are looking after me, and I'm alright. I'll post this long entry next time I can get on-line. Thanks to those who have been praying for me and for my protection. Please join me in praying that God will use this event for His glory and that He would redeem for His purposes a situation that Satan intended for evil. :)

Tuesday

It is Friday morning, and I am just now able to post this entry I wrote on Tuesday...

It is Tuesday, and I am laying on the Stewart's couch thinking about heading to bed. I've had a relaxing day. The family and I had planned to go to the beach this morning, but the wind was fierce and the sandy beach would have been miserable. Instead, Liesl dropped me off at Kirstenbosch Gardens, a large natural reserve at the base of the mountain filled with winding pathways and gads of African plants and exquisite flowers. i hit the gift shop then made my way around the garden armed with two cameras and an ipod. I quickly realized I'm the type of person who wants people in my pictures. Though I took plenty of nature pictures, I may need to drag someone along with me and spend another day in this amazing place while I'm here. I walked for a few hours, taking in the sights and feeling the wind blow my hair in every conceivable direction, then I found a tea room where I had tea and quiche. Just as I ordered my meal, rain started falling, and I watched as the mountain misted over and the flowers bent with the windy rain. The skies had cleared when I finished my lunch, and I walked and found a secluded bench under a tree overlooking a meadow. I sat, read a couple Psalms, and prayed aloud. I brought sin before God and asked forgiveness. I had brought some general sin to him before, but I felt I needed to acknowledge specific sin and ask forgiveness. As I spoke, the Lord brought me before His throne. I felt God's presence and physically hung my head as I presented Him with my shame. He lifted my eyes to His, and He declared me innocent and pure. He spoke, and I was worthy of his passionate love and attention. I stood righteously before Him without shame. No sin stood between us, and I was amazed. As I write this, I fear. I think of all the multitude of sins that stand unconfessed and that I know I will continue to embrace. My Lord reminds me that his blood is enough, so I must be still. I headed to another cafe and devoured some chocolate cake as I watched the African rain sweep in once again. I journaled, listened to music, and headed back to meet Craig to pick me up.

At the house, I played with the children until Susan Gammon came to visit. She knew my parents when we lived in Capetown, and I asked her about her time with them... especially about her memories of my dad. After dinner, Craig told me of the political and social situation in South Africa when my family was here. My parents certainly stepped into a country in crisis. My parents were brace and had a massive influence on many lives while they were here. Craig told me stories about them and pulled out pictures. It was good to match my childhood memories with an adult perspective of that time and those events, and it was good to recognize the work my parents did in the Kingdom during that time. It is especially good to be a witness to my father's legacy. I see how God continues to use his influence in the lives of many people today. I think I'm off to bed now. Hope this finds you well.

PS - Family, I found my keys! There were in my backpack in a pocket I thought I looked in... weird and yay! Love you all!